Go Deep. Grow Deep. Stay Rooted.
“Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” — Jeremiah 17:7-8 (NASB)
Conflict is a part of life. Whether in our homes, workplaces, or even within the body of Christ, we will encounter disagreements, misunderstandings, and hurt feelings. Yet, as followers of Christ, we are called to respond to conflict differently than the world. In a world where harsh words and division seem to be the norm, kindness stands out as a powerful testimony of God’s grace at work within us.
This month, as we continue our journey of being Rooted in Virtues, we turn our focus to Kindness: Responding to Conflict with Kindness. Kindness is not just an act of politeness—it is a spiritual discipline that reflects the heart of God. It is a virtue that must be deeply rooted in our hearts, so that even in difficult moments, it flows naturally from us.
Ephesians 4:32 reminds us of the kind of kindness God calls us to:
"Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." (Ephesians 4:32, NASB)
So how do we cultivate kindness in a way that is deep, lasting, and transformative? Let’s explore what it means to Go Deep, Grow Deep, and Stay Rooted in the virtue of kindness.
Deep Roots: Kindness as a Reflection of God’s Heart
Before we can practice kindness in difficult moments, we must first understand its foundation. Kindness is not merely about being “nice” or agreeable. It is a reflection of God’s nature.
Titus 3:4-5 (NASB) says,
"But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared, He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we did in righteousness, but in accordance with His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit."
God’s kindness is what led Him to send Jesus to redeem us. It is through His kindness that we have been forgiven, restored, and given new life. And just as God has shown kindness to us, we are called to extend that same kindness to others—especially in moments of conflict.
The world tells us to react with anger, to defend ourselves at all costs, and to return insult for insult. But as believers, we are rooted in something far greater. We are planted by the living water, sustained by God’s Spirit, and strengthened to bear the fruit of kindness even when it is difficult.
Go Deep: Cultivating Kindness in the Heart
If we want to be people who naturally respond with kindness in conflict, we must first cultivate it in the quiet places of our hearts. Here are three spiritual practices to help us go deep in kindness:
Pray for a Kind Heart
Ask God to fill you with His kindness. Pray for a heart that reflects His gentleness and love, even in difficult situations.
Meditate on God’s Kindness
Spend time reflecting on passages that speak of God’s kindness (Titus 3:4-5, Psalm 145:17, Romans 2:4). Let His Word shape your response to others.
Journal Your Reactions
When you face conflict, take time to reflect: Did I respond with kindness? How could I have shown more grace? Writing down your experiences will help you recognize growth areas.
By intentionally nurturing kindness in our hearts, we prepare ourselves to respond in ways that reflect Christ.
Grow Deep: Living Out Kindness in Conflict
Once we have cultivated kindness in our hearts, we must put it into practice. Here are three ways to grow deep in kindness:
Pause Before Reacting
In moments of conflict, take a deep breath before speaking. Ask yourself, Is what I’m about to say kind? Will it build up or tear down? A kind response can de-escalate tension and open the door for peace.
Choose to Listen First
Kindness is often shown through how we listen. Instead of rushing to defend yourself, take time to truly understand the other person’s perspective.
Respond with Grace, Not Retaliation
When others are unkind, our natural tendency is to react in the same way. But Jesus calls us to something greater. “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who are abusive to you.” (Luke 6:28, NASB) Kindness in the face of conflict is a powerful witness of God’s love.
As we grow in these practices, we become people who reflect the kindness of Christ, even in the most difficult situations.
Stay Rooted: Overcoming the Challenges of Kindness
Even when we desire to be kind, there will be challenges. Sometimes, people will take advantage of our kindness. Other times, our emotions will feel too strong to respond with grace. So how do we stay rooted in kindness?
Trust in God’s Strength
Kindness is not something we produce on our own—it comes from abiding in Christ. “I am the vine, you are the branches; the one who remains in Me, and I in him bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5, NASB) Stay connected to God, and He will sustain you.
Remember the Bigger Picture
When conflict arises, step back and ask, Is this worth damaging a relationship over? Often, small disagreements can be handled with kindness and understanding.
Lean on the Holy Spirit
The fruit of the Spirit includes kindness (Galatians 5:22-23). When you feel weak, ask the Holy Spirit to help you walk in kindness.
When we stay rooted in Christ, kindness will not just be an occasional act—it will become a way of life.
Keep Going Deep in Kindness
Beloved, kindness is more than a virtue—it is the character of Christ shining through us. When we respond to conflict with kindness, we reflect the heart of our Savior.
As we continue our journey of being Rooted in Virtues, let us commit to going deep in kindness through prayer and reflection, growing deep by practicing kindness in daily interactions, and staying rooted by relying on the strength of Christ.
Even when kindness is difficult, remember: “Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord…They will be like a tree planted by the water.” (Jeremiah 17:7-8) Stay rooted in Him, and He will give you the strength to be kind, even in the hardest moments.